Dharma

“Discovering your dharma is not about going somewhere and finding something. It’s not outside of you but rather arises from going within.” – Sahara Rose

At our yoga retreat in Costa Rica last month, I asked everyone during Opening Circle to share something unique about themselves or to demonstrate a party trick. Karen hand-whistled Peace Like a River; Alli told us she played the upright bass; Morgan bent her tongue into weird shapes; Sharon said she had the ability to see and support others’ greatness; Consi said that Pocahontas was her 9th great grandmother; Margot ironically revealed that she had not been born a female; I did a split.

“As random as some of these things might seem,” I said to the group, “they’re a unique expression of you. They’re things you’re good at or bring you joy. Maybe you’ve used them to inspire or bring joy to others.”

I then brought up dharma, a Sanskrit term with a bunch of complex meanings that have evolved over thousands of years. At its most basic level, dharma means natural propensity, function, or property. For example, the dharma of fire is to burn, of water to be wet, of a warrior to fight, of parents to care for their children. 

A definition popularized by Deepak Chopra is that dharma is your purpose in life. According to Chopra, each of us has one or more unique gifts or special talents—things we (and others) know we do well. When we express them, we often lose track of time. They’re our musical pursuits, our random party tricks, our ability to support others.

My party trick of doing a split stemmed from a recurring dream I had had for years and years that I was suddenly able to do one. I’m not a “dream person,” but I can’t tell you how many times I had that dream and how awesome I felt when I woke up after having dreamt it. So when I turned 39, I decided to set a goal to do a split by my 40th birthday. I had heard that yoga increased flexibility, so I added yoga to my cardio and strength-training routine. Because I’m naturally flexible, I was able to reach my goal before I turned 40 and have been doing splits at parties, bars and on my mat ever since.

Chopra maintains that we make full use of our dharma when we use our unique talents and passions in service to others. In my case, my random dreams of doing a split led me to yoga. Combining my yoga practice with an ever-evolving interest in spirituality and a passion for teaching led me to become a yoga teacher and eventually to start my own business.

Ideally, we want to balance our gifts and passions with the things we might not love doing. I’m not a fan of accounting, but I need to stay on top of it to keep my business running. But if we play to our strengths while also reinforcing the parts of our lives that might require a little more attention, we can create balance, strength, and flexibility, just as we do on the mat. We don’t only favor the poses we’re good at; we work on poses that illuminate our limitations. And we practice paying attention to how we use our strengths and limitations to help us grow.

The more we learn about who we are, including what we’re good at or where we might feel stuck, the more we can tap into our highest selves (that unchanging light and power within) and fully express our dharma by inspiring and empowering others.